Living

 I recently watched a movie called Living starring Bill Nighy who played a public servant, Rodney Williams in the Public Works Department of the London City Council who faces a terminal illness. The plot is built on a previous film Ikuru and the Russian Novella, "The Death of Ivan Ilyich"(Wikipedia.org). Essentially it seeks to move beyond the nickname given to him by one of his clerks, Miss Harris who calls him Mr. Zombie. This is a person who looks alive on the outside but is dead on the inside. The movie touches on what it means to be alive and to live a worthwhile life. It is set against the backdrop of a group of women petitioning for a playground in a deserted area of the local council area and how their application passes from one department to another before landing back in the public works department. One poignant line which weaves throughout the movie is the image of children being reluctantly called back from the playground by their mothers. The impression that Rodney Williams ponders is whether when God calls him home he will reluctantly respond to the call as he ponders what he cherishes in life.

In the story of Lazarus, we see similar scenes played out as Jesus faces the death of a good friend. This is more than just a realization that the sickness will end in death but how we make sense of our lives. Martha is able to assent to her belief in the resurrection, and Mary is able to assent to the importance of where our hearts lie but Jesus draws attention to how we are all called to be present to God. This is not just about thinking and feeling our way toward God but also how we are physically present in what brings us life. It calls us to ponder not just what God can do for us but how we can be with God and live in union with God. There is an element where we come to life when we lose our life for the good of another. 

As we enter into the last days of Lent and come closer to Holy Week we are called to discover how we are present as body, mind, and spirit to the realities of our daily life. Are we just making our way through life or do we find the deeper meaning which is present in the silence of our hearts?

What blinds us and binds us?

 Whenever we experience physical limits or sickness in life we can tell a story about our own worth. The link between our body and our spirit is at the heart of the Gospel for this weekend. We can start to tell ourselves a story not only about our illness but also about ourselves. There can be a tendency to make ourselves into a disease rather than a person who is called to live with a disease. This is where we can become mixed up between what causes our ill health, the reality of suffering with the daily effects of that condition, and the reality that we are called to be whole in ourselves.

We see this in the way that Jesus responds to the man born blind. He not only seeks to remedy his physical condition but also his social isolation which has forced him into a life of begging. The healing is more than just physical healing but also societal healing that restores him to the community. We witness that the person is restored to his original dignity where Jesus sees him not just his sickness.

This is the challenge of any religious community we seek to become people who are suffering. This is helping us to orientate ourselves towards the other for the good of the other. Our communities are not called to become clubs for the saved but field hospitals for those in need. In this way, we witness the relationship that is at the heart of any healing, an encounter with the person of Jesus. He looks at us as we look at him. 

We discover that especially in our own age we can be liberated from what blinds and binds us. We discover a truth that transforms our day and restores our dignity. We witness to the incarnate presence of Jesus who restores us in thanksgiving for the person we can become.

Having deeper conversations

 The woman at the well is an example of how God draws us more deeply into a conversation that has life-changing consequences. The meeting between Jesus and the woman reminds me of my Camino experience 20 years ago when I walked into a Spanish village and sat around the common well. Only the pilgrims were foolish enough to be out and about in the middle of the day. The rest of the village had shut their windows and doors to escape the heat and rest. Yet it is during this time of resting that we discovered the importance of remaining hydrated and we welcomed both the temporary shade and the refreshing water.

Yet like many discussions on the Camino people started to talk about everything and nothing. The beginning of the dialogue was noting what can separate us but also what can unite us. This starts with the everyday question of what will quench our thirst. It is a willingness to respond to our physical needs but it also touches on a thirst for meaning which will transform our discussions. We seek to encounter life-giving water that will fill us with hope.

As the encounter continues this touches on the various traditions between Jewish and Samaritan cultures and how we rely on our history and ritual to understand how we reach out to God. Yet in the midst of these insights, Jesus reveals how God reaches out to us so that we can worship spirit and truth. This allows us to see how our faith is built on this personal encounter with Jesus that allows us to bear witness to others in our lives. This revelation allows us to see how our prayer transforms our relationships with other not just for the good of ourselves. Our prayer draws us closer because God meets us in our openness to sit down and be present and listen.

Whom do we seek?

 When we enter into prayer there is an anticipation that we will grow closer to God and that God can draw closer to us. Yet this is not an exact science where a particular form or method will work. Yet it is actually a call to enter deeper into a relationship where God takes the initiative and invites us to listen more closely. We are not just called to hear our own voice but rather the voice of God holding us in silence.

I think too often we can be like Peter, James, and John when we climb a high mountain and taste the rarified air. This intoxicating feeling can overcome us and blind us with a loving presence that transcends our every day.  These occasions seem too rare or infrequent that we want to hold on to them and like Peter build three tents to contain our insight. Often like the modern habit of wanting to capture the moment with our mobiles or cameras, we do not want to lose the experience. Yet when we look at these photos later they do not quite meet our expectations and we wonder what it was that we were seeking.

In these dark nights, God encounters us in a way that seems to be devoid of words and images. Like being plunged into a cloud of unknowing where we can become afraid that we encounter only darkness and even separation from the one we seek. Yet in these moments we are no longer called to listen to our thoughts, ideas, or images but rather the quiet still voice which says this is my beloved Son listen to him. This allows us to become aware that our lives are not just centered on our own striving but rather on a God who envelops us and surrounds us.

These encounters allow us in these wordless, imageless moments to ponder more deeply a God who is at the heart of all things and who is no-thing. God holds us closer so that our lives may become a blessing not just for ourselves but for others. That we may proclaim life which transforms our very being. It helps us to be enfolded into a way of being present that transfigures our world.